My Story: Part 8- Faith

I think the the part of my life most affected by my diagnosis with lupus was my faith. At the time before my diagnosis, I was on a roll. I was doing really well at work, was in the running for chief resident, on my way to becoming a licensed physician. I had a really awesome boyfriend and flourishing relationship. My body was getting in shape and I was confident. I felt good about myself and my life. I felt powerful, and I felt like my life was finally in complete control. I was self reliant and could do everything on my own. I didn’t need anything or anyone because I had it all.

But then it happened. I was diagnosed with lupus and my whole world came crashing down. I no longer was in control of my body or my life. And that’s when I realized I needed God.

Now, I grew up Christian and attended church weekly for the most part. Religion was always a part of my life, but it was something I just did out of habit, maybe even out of guilt or obligation. It was never really a personal thing. There were times when I had felt close to God, but it wasn’t constant. It was only during times of need.

And now another time of need presented itself. But this time it was very different. I had never had an issue in my life before that would cause such a drastic and complete change in my life. And here I was completely lost, and life was completely out of my hands. But it was in God’s hands. He was in control. It didn’t mean that life would be easy, but now I knew I had Someone who cared for me and could heal me.

Through the blessings and the trials my faith in God grew. I would like to say that my faith is and was always strong, but that’s not the truth. As I got better, I would start to feel
like I didn’t need God again. Or when I was feeling really sick or hopeless, I would doubt God’s love and plan for my life. But as time has passed, and I have witnessed the healing and the love, I have learned to trust in God and His purpose for my life.

I know that we all have different beliefs, but I wanted to share mine because it’s such an important part of my life. It is not my intention to push my beliefs on anyone else. My personal relationship with God has formed the person I am today and has developed my perspective on life.

For those of us who are believers, I think it’s very important to be strong in our faith and continue our support for each other in prayers. If anyone would like to be added to the Prayer Corner, please let me know.

2 thoughts on “My Story: Part 8- Faith

  1. Ten years ago when I was diagnosed with breast cancer I got through the hard parts of it with Psalms 139:16 Your eyes saw my unformed body. All the days ordained for me were written in your book before on of them came to be. I was where I was because my days were ordained to be there. That gave me great peace. Some of my friends ask me how I can still cling and trust in a loving God with all that I have gone through. I don’t understand how I could have gone through what I have without the peace and security of that loving God. You are also in my prayers.

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